“Fashion” words and idioms are hardly a nascent invention. But while previous efforts meandered safely within the realm of affordable fashions (see Clueless [1995] for its many Valspeak additions to this category), this newest breed of fashion jargon is fiercely eyeing the industry’s firmament – haute couture. Blame Tyra for this one. So while you once looked “sexy” in that banded dress, you are now likely “high fashion”, “fierce”, maybe even “workin’ it”.
I argue that if you can’t offer a detailed account of Olivier Theyskens’ career, you shouldn’t be allowed to intersperse your “Michael Kors” and “pop of colour” babble with “high fashion” or “haute couture”. So I’ve put together a (growing) laundry list of terms that bona fide fashion fans should avoid. Some are obvious misappropriations, others pretentious, and some are just downright unsavoury. As with all rules, there are exceptions. It’s one thing if Alexandre de Betak fires off a resonating “Work!!!” backstage at Dior; it’s another if it’s the flamboyant sales clerk in the H&M change room.
Celebrity design(ers) – Please refer to Ms. Montag, Ms. Conrad, and Ms. Lopez as environmental scanners.
Chanel-like/Chanel-esque/Chanel-inspired – Even I’m freakin’ scared of those Chanel ads in WWD.
Couture/Couturier- We’ve bastardized it. Only use when referring to designs approved by the Chambre Syndicale de la Couture Parisienne.
________-Couture – Used as a suffix. Also see: Juicy-Cuture, Ferosha Couture, and House of Dereon.
________-Chic – Used as a suffix. Also see: Eco-chic, Aviator-chic, and Sailor-chic. Especially obnoxious when applied to actual ecologists, aviators, and sailors.
Day-to-Night – Do you want the world to know you read InStyle?
Edgy – Freha is edgy. Meghan Collison is edgy. Your mousy-coiffed best friend with a penchant for jelly bracelets and pinky stilettos is not.
Fabulous(ity) – Kimora.Lee.Simons. ’Nuff said.
Fashionista
Ferosha/Ferosha couture – Adopting vernacular from a guy who thinks Victoria Beckham is a style icon?
Funky
Fierce - Eva Pigford was heralded as “fierce”. Look what happened to her.
High fashion
Hot mess
Hot tranny mess – Unless, of course, you’re referring to an actual tranny.
Mayjor/May-jah – Despicable solely because of the Victoria Beckham factor.
Michael Kors – Is there ever really a need to discuss clothing so lackadaisical and a designer so overexposed? Besides, his name can often by indiscernibly interchanged with Sr. Tropez, Aspen, or cashmere.
Pop of colour – Only apt if you’re describing a Cameron Diaz-style violation of taste.
Strut – Tanya D. struts. You, my friend, walk.
Smile with your eyes
Work/Werk (It)/ You better work!
Haha! This is the funniest thing I have read in a long time. Everything on that list is completely true
That was fantastically funny!
You’re beyond back.
language is what integrates people in relation to cultural identities. I would say that making clear your style approach does not make part of the “mass”, does not make the mass disappear. Hot mess Fierceness will still linger for a while because it mocks the snobbish style elite. Maybe the author thinks he is the elite when failing then being just a voice for the masses simple approach. But still is all the relation of exclusion and belonging in fashion what makes this happen…think more Foucault, less Lagerfeld. Ugly is just pretty for most people…
http://ouicestlamode.blogspot.com/2008/04/you-better-work.html
wow, i just got told. like, 5 times over. does it count if i was doing it in an ironic way?
[...] Verbatim gives us a list of what not to say. Best – Couture/Couturier- We’ve bastardized it. Only use when referring to designs approved by [...]
I am engaged so was on a wedding dress hunt for a couple of months and I got so sick of a certain phrase – when a bride-to-be puts on a dress that doesn’t cut it, everyone says it’s “missing the wow factor”.
i am a firm believer in only using “hot mess” to apply to dirty sexy dudes. that’s it.
this was freaking awesome