DIAMONDS ARE A GIRL’S BREAST FRIEND: OUR FAVORITE VICTORIA’S SECRET FANTASY BRAS

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Some people are glued to the NYSE, or find themselves buried in the WSJ. However, we at FashionVerbatim have dutifully put aside such questionable frivolities in favor of the one truly important annual indicator of our economic climate: the dollar value of the Victoria’s Secret Fantasy Bra.

Since 1996, we have seen this (literally) brilliant, multifaceted marketing device scattered across the globes of such supermodels as Heidi Klum, Tyra, Gisele and Karolina Kurkova. Miranda Kerr (Below) modeled 2011′s under-the-sea inspired contraption, encrusted with $2.5 million in diamonds and pearls.

We can just picture Barack Obama, huddled at his desk late-night, brow furrowed, studying the Fantasy Bra value chart on the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show wiki page. How do we restore our fine country to glory of a carefree Y2K, when Gisele was lounging around in $15 million worth of diamonds and rubies? Or when Heidi Klum was spangled in dazzling blue-and-white stars?

We are currently basking in patriotism. Join us after the jump, for more of our favorite Fantasy Bras from glory years past.

While the Hearts On Fire Fantasy Bra worn by Karolina (Above) was only valued at a pithy $6.5 million, it is perhaps my singular favorite of all. Could it be the fact that the round brilliant cut, when perfectly executed, is the most refractive (read: sparkly) of all? Or perhaps the absence of any odd cutouts or caging that would create a rather horrifying effect on an actual woman’s breasts, given the weight of such a piece? Seriously amazing. Karolina lucked out.

I also wholeheartedly enjoy the 1996 original, modeled by Claudia Schiffer in the days where wrist wrinkles and stray hairs actually existed in published photographs (Below). It truly is a bygone era.

To that end, I can’t finish this post without a little Tyra Mail. It would be more satisfying to post a video of the retoucher removing all semblances of actual anatomy from Banks’ treasure chest, but I couldn’t find one. I’ll just focus on that ENORMOUS upside-down pear-shaped diamond, appropriately taking the same shape as the tears of many ANTM rejects…

Images: International Business Times, re-actor, Vixen Lady